Mac-n-Cheese: The Final Frontier
Prologue:
At first, I was horrified. Cookiecrumb and Kevin hosting a Mac-n-Cheese event? But I can’t! You don’t understand. I just can’t. I cried to Chopper: Look what they’re doing, I said. How cruel. How evil. Can I ever forgive them? If you make mac-n-cheesy goodness and eat it alone, can I ever forgive you? Chopper merely shrugged and said, hey, it’s me here. I can make it happen. I bit my lip in fear. But… the history, I whimpered… my history…
1.A cheesy childhood.
Oh dear lord did I love mac-n-cheese as a child. It wasn’t just that it was vast and goopy and satisfying beyond all reason, or that it sometimes held the exquisite secret of little salami nuggets, tucked beneath its placid surface. No, it was this: It lacked vegetables. And for a child, especially one in a house wherein vegetables were routinely cooked to oblivion, this was nirvana. I always went back for seconds. Sometimes even thirds or fourths. If the mac-n-cheese pot had been bottomless and my plate accompanied by an equally bottomless glass of Nestle’s Quick, I would never have left the table. Not even for episodes of Star Trek.
2.College in a box
When one is single and one is in college and living in a tiny apartment, one’s episodes of Star Trek are accompanied by a box. The blue kind. You know the one. Gross, eh? I bet Spock’s Plomeek soup never tasted so bad. Perhaps it was just the way I (ineptly) cooked it, but my Kraft mac-n-cheese always came out a little gritty. Not that this stopped me. Nope, not one bit. After all, it was cheap and easy and isn’t college all about cheap and easy? Hey! I’m talking about food, here.
3.Is that a shot put in my gut, or am I just sorry I ate you?
We’re on break from the gaming session, it’s been five weeks and still no one knows my red shirt security goon is really a Romulan spy. I love surgical alteration. Now, if only I could get some surgical alteration on my gut, I could make it through this cheesy meal without feeling like I’ve been injected with an elephant’s dose of cordrazine. What is up with this? I used to love mac-n-cheese and now I can barely touch the stuff. Could it be… no, say not so! It’s true. My gut hates cows.
4.Cold turkey (sandwiches)
Are you coming over for dinner, the in-law says, I’m making mac-n-cheese! I attempt to hide my sour face and fail miserably. Oh, right (now, she remembers), you can’t do cheese. There’s some cold turkey in the fridge! Dave can make you a sandwich! I try very hard not to pout, but I’m just not good at it. Oh, I’ve no doubt the sandwich will be just dandy. Heck, it may even have fancy Dijon mustard on it, but must I watch everyone else eat mac-n-cheese? Can’t I go downstairs to the family room instead? C’mon, Sci Fi Channel’s running a marathon, and I could be communing with Chekov and the space hippies right this very instant! Hey! You think they solved lactose intolerance in the 23rd century?
5.Nirvana, with goat.
So, if I’m going to make it, Chopper says, I’m going to make the creamy kind. Not that crusty stuff that ends up tasting like a rubber waffle. We’ll have to get kasseri, since we know it melts and we know you can eat it, and we’ll need something other than cow’s milk. Um, I say, just a wee bit optimistic for once, would you believe I saw a quart of goat’s milk in the health food section at Fred Meyer? No way! Way! We (boldly) go, we shop, we find. Chopper cooks. He serves me up a small but perfect portion (not too much on my first try in over a decade), and I take a bite. Simple, unadorned with frivolity save for a dash of smoked paprika and a sprig of fresh thyme. Creamy, just like Mom used to make. I am in nirvana. Hey, I think, I should eat this in front of the telly with the boys in gold, red, and blue. But, damn, SciFi channel never shows Trek episodes anymore. Ah well, that’s okay. I get to eat mac-n-cheese.
Goatie Mac-n-Cheese
Ingredients
- 1 ounce Whole Butter
- 1 ounce Unbleached white flour
- 1/2 pound Kasseri cheese
- 1 pint Goat milk
- 1/2 pound Dry rigatoni
- To taste Salt and white pepper
Method
- Cook the rigatoni until “al dente,” then strain and set aside.
- Melt butter in a medium-sized sauce pan. Add flour, mix thoroughly to make a roux, and cook until a “popcorn” aroma can be detected.
- Add milk and whisk until the roux is completely mixed in. Then bring to a boil, and quickly reduce to a simmer. Reduce by one quarter. Some milk will burn to the bottom of the pan, DO NOT WHISK BURNT MILK INTO THE SAUCE. (He really means this!)
- Add the cheese and stir until it is all melted.
- Add the cooked pasta to the sauce, stir to coat. Serve hot, garnish with a sprinkle of smoked paprika and fresh thyme leaves.
Look! A Technorati tag! mac-n-cheese-off
Ah, my cat, Kitikata-san, has been telling me about you, your food and your blog. What lovely mac and cheese you made. I love smoked paprika, and I bet that worked well with your sauce. Does goat’s milk add a better flavor than cow’s milk? What a super photo of your creation! I am glad you played with mac and cheese!
Miz D,
You are indeed lucky to have a husband so dedicated to your happiness that he will adulterate one of Americas’s few culinary classics (and no, we don’t need to get into why America is so culinarily “challenged” that mac-n-cheese is a classic) just to make you happy.
You two are as bad as CookieCrumb. Grumph.
Sorry Kev. This was the only way I’d ever get to eat this wonderful dish ever again for the rest of my life (without a large amount of guilt and the occasional beating that is…).
Lannae, granted, I haven’t had a glass of cow milk in years, but the goat milk is rich — and I think there’s more flavor, but then I’m probably biased! Oh, and yes, the smoked paprika was perfect. (Uhoh. I think I’m turning into a smoked paprika addict.)
mmm, does look very good. I’m afraid my mac & cheese off contribution had quite a few veggies–arugula, peppers & tomatoes. Very much adult mac & cheese!
that photo is definitely the prettiest mrs d. and i think i’m inspired to try a goaty macaroni cheese as i’ve never had that.
Wow, that certainly is the prettiest! And your story was too fun to read. Thanks for sharing. :-)
Way to go, Chopper and Miz. I bet that was good. Nice pix, too.
But.
No salami nuggets?
great story, happy ending and beeeutiful photo!
Chopper,
I do understand.
Oh, what sweet sweet victory! Beauty.
oh my. Portland foodies with a love of Star Trek? Does life get any better? Surely not! I adored this post.
Wow! Seriously! Wow! That makes me incredibly hungry looking at that picture. The goat cheese has me under it’s spell.
By the way–I will host Weekend Cat Blogging next weekend (Jan. 13-14). The spot seems to be missing a host, so I will do it unless someone else yells “Foul!”
Sher
http://www.whatdidyoueat.typepad.com
I am glad for you it worked! And I know what I will make next time I’ll watch a Star Trek movie (We just got 10 Star Trek DVD’s borrowed from the neighbour – and he has more!).
What is Kasseri cheese, same king as feta?
Gracianne: Actually Kasseri is more akin to Monterey Jack, with a sharper, more tangy flavor. The important part about it is that it easily melts.
That is one gourmet mac-n-cheese!
Yes, we definitely aimed straight at the childhood memories division with this one. No fancy stuff save for the tiny dish and the sprinklies on top. (Oh, and CC: goat cheese is spendy! Broke our budget, so no room left for salami!)
You have probably realized this by now, but you can indeed still have the mac-cheese-Trek experience — Channel 49 is now running original series episodes Sunday nights at 10 pm. [I *think* there may be a Saturday airing on either 12 or 49, but I also think that's less stable.] These are, I believe, the episodes as tuned up with (surprisingly subtly) modernized SFX….