Twelve ways not to blog while in crisis mode
1. Forget you have a blog.
2. Start a three part series and only post part one.
3. Crash your hard drive and lose two months worth of post drafts.
4. Listen to emo rock until the paint peels off all your dark elf figurines and the only posts you can write are the ones that begin with the phrase “Dear World.”
5. Post a poll about what you did on your vacation, even if it wasn’t a vacation and you really don’t want to talk about it.
6. Forget other people have blogs. In fact, forget blogs exist at all and be completely stunned when you accidentally click on that button on your Google home page that says “reader” and discover some five thousand unread posts.
7. Read a print media opinion piece on the destruction of ‘high culture’ by evil, egalitarian bloggers, and almost believe it, just for a second.
8. Teach a seminar on blogging, hand out your card, then add in a tiny voice: “but, um, remember all that stuff I said about updating on a regular basis? well…”
9. Post a gleeful “return to blogging” announcement and then forget to return to blogging.
10. Better yet, make the cat post it!
11. Reintroduce yourself to the world of blogging with a photo retrospective — on the day your hard drive goes belly up and you can’t access all your archived photos.
12. Wait till your third wedding anniversary to post because at least then you’ve got an excuse to include a pretty picture: