When she paints her face, she slips into a second universe. Her garland grows black with wanting to go home, but the girls there, they need imaginary friends too. They shout and squeal and she says, “Shhh. Later, when it’s dark as roses, I’ll slip from my hiding place and be the thing that glows in the corner of the garden while no one’s looking.”
Because orange is such a friendly color, no one ever suspects them until it’s too late.
“…wilt thou kneel with me?
Do, then, dear heart; for heaven shall hear our prayers;
Or with our sighs we’ll breathe the welkin dim,
And stain the sun with fog…”
—Titus Andronicus, III, i
(Alan Waldock as Titus and Debra Ann Lund as Lavinia. The first full-length play I directed out of college. A razor’s edge, a crazy moment in time. I wish I had it on tape.)
Boris was fond of microscopes. He thought, if only I could just get under one, hang out on a petri dish for a tick, then everyone could see and admire my luxurious fur. ‘Oh!’ they’d exclaim, ‘That Boris! He wouldn’t make a half-bad pet!’
Unfortunately, Boris was quite wrong.
It’s the bone one! No, the abalone! No, the one with the anchor on it! Agggh, I don’t know which one! Too many buttons! We’re all gonna die!
(This completely frivolous moment brought to you by someone who really needs a nap.)
I caught a tire once. Put it on my bike and rode off, just like new.
The best part about the wedding was nobody minded that their clothes had no hems, or that the groom was barefoot and the bride had a rubber band for a belt. It was perfect. They were both radiant, so much in love, and their smiles never wavered.
I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Narwhals in formation off the Laurentian Abyssal. Colossal squid in a dark ballet, lit only by the bioluminescent glow of their subsequent prey. Sea horses leaping coral reefs in tandem. All those moments, lost in time, replaced by beach balls and so much tasteless kibble.
She wasn’t expecting the elf to appear that day. After all, she had her camera with her, and elves are notoriously shy. Her elves, anyway. Her neighbor’s elves — they were another matter. They’d pull stunts to get in the school paper. They dressed in orange. With polka dots.
This elf, he only made occasional appearances and only on this one particular bench. One summer, her father rearranged the garden furniture and the elf was nowhere to be seen. She dragged the bench back into its proper place (after rolling the stone birdbath out of its improper place), and waited, camera in hand.
The air shimmered, smelled of lilacs, and, after an abrupt crackle-pop (like pop-rocks, she noted), he appeared.
She slipped her finger over the shutter release and pressed down. He smiled.
“I know you’re not really my brother,” she said. “But I won’t tell Mom.”
1BR, SPEC LK VW, PRIV, DOCK AVAIL, PETS.